Imaginative Dispostion, Creative Pleasures

I was sitting in class this evening...a lecture series with guest artists and such. (A very interesting two hours of my week.) And during this particular evening I found myself thinking of the strangest things…some may refer to them as spiritual matters, others, matters of the heart, or matters of the mind, or simple contemplation of my place and meaning in this existence. Some of what I meditated upon came from references my teacher made or comments of the other students but some…some thoughts came from somewhere else…inspired in some other way. I am still reflecting on everything so I do not wish to post my thoughts on many of those matters this evening. I am in the process of discerning truth in the muddle of ideas that float around inside my cranium. Nonetheless, I did have one idea that I would like to share at this moment in time. I came to the realization that my line of work, what I have chosen to do with my life, my artistic “gift” and endeavor to create is…well…is me.

I get “to do” what “I am”...

…how rare…how special…how great is that. Many do not get to realize that dream. To do what their very essence is. I feel like with this revelation that I must now protect this great gift that I have been given and this opportunity to develop it.

Art has its agency. It can be used for good or bad. We, artists, must “be good stewards of our art”, of our talent, of our gift. And I think this applies universally to whatever drives you as a human being. Whatever gifts and talents and insights you may have discovered within yourself…protect and use them wisely.

Anyhow, these are my thoughts this evening. Now I would like to throw another idea out there. An unfinished thought that maybe you may have some comment upon. And that is this idea: I get to do what I am…but “what am I?” There are many answers to this question but think about this in your own life…your own perspective. Who are you…to yourself, who are you? Do you really know? Do you see all the potential and greatness that is within you? I think we can all begin to catch a glimmer of that which is within us. If you are of the Latter-day Saint faith there is much to read on the divine worth of each soul, and it is stressed that we know that we are children of God with all that accompanies such. But even with this knowledge, with this understanding, or this delineated depiction of our divine roles and greatness can we really and truly comprehend who we really are. I can only speak for myself on this matter, and I say that I do not. I know much about myself. I learn more every day that I live and ponder and search for truth. But I also know that I have not fully recognized the great potential and divinity within myself. That, I guess, is part of progression and the purpose of this life.

To make a biblical reference, in the New Testament, 1^st Corinthians 13:12 it says this:

“For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

And this of course is my interpretation, but glass if you look up the term, is old English for ‘mirror’. So I assume, to paraphrase in my own words, “that we are looking in a mirror in a dark room” which means we can not see clearly who we really are, “but that soon we will see ourselves face to face” therefore truly understanding who we are…even more clearly than if the dark room were lit so that we could see ourselves in the mirror. It is still a reflection. No, we will see ourselves “face to face” and see, understand, and know ourselves. We only “know in part” now.

Now, once again I reflect the question back to you. How do I [you] go about creating without understanding who I [you] really am [are]? Is the creation process part of the search to know who I am? Or is it the result of catching that glimpse of who I am? Is the only purpose to create for myself? Is it a greater purpose to create for others? Can great art truly be created without inspiration even if unknowingly done so? I don’t have solid answers to any of these questions, though, I do have plenty of ideas on the subject at hand but that is all for another time. For now I am finished.